Chapter 18: How to Express Your Feelings to the One You Love

Love is not about giving or receiving gifts but about sharing each other’s feelings and letting each other know how much you really care. You need to be romantic, creative, and unique. The best way to show someone you really care is by words and how your actions make them feel special. You need to say something coming from the heart and show them from your soul. Love them for who they are and not for who you are.


Steps:

1. Think about all the great moments that you have shared with that person for inspiration. If you think you won't remember, write it down or even better, make it into a poem.
2. Try to think of words that can describe what your feelings towards him/her are. The happiness you feel when you are around him/her and the necessity you have to being with him/her.
3. Find a place where you'll be comfortable and alone.
4. Tell them how much you want to be with them. They will appreciate that you are showing them your love and not just saying it.
5. Spend as much time with them as you can. If you love some one, you should prefer always to see him/her all the time.
6. If you feel they have something to say, do not ignore them.
7. Finally, just say it. Don't try to think of the perfect time to say it because sometimes it will never come out, if you become too nervous. If you didn't prepare anything to say, just speak your heart out.

Tips:

• Do not stress about it. They are your feelings; you just need to learn how to express them.
• You don't need to be at a fancy place to tell him/her your feelings. Just pick somewhere where you could be alone.
• If you want to be romantic, go somewhere special. For example; you can go where you both met, where you first kissed each other or just somewhere with a nice view or a place that is special to both of you.
• Don't forget to say "I love you," if you do and if you really mean it, say it a lot because that person will never get tired of hearing it.
• Express your love as often as you are able to.
• Don't break off eye contact while expressing your love.
• You could always write your feelings in a letter that expresses how you feel and give it to them.
• Always just let it flow out or you will never get that feeling out of you!

Warnings:

• To truly love is to give, give and give and expect nothing in return. This makes it a very special relationship when both think this way.
• Do not be afraid to give and show your love, understand and respect each other's feelings and emotions. Remember our hearts are fragile and feel everything.
• Don't end it if they don't say it back. Nothing says both parties fall in love at the same time, continue to love them and when it's right for them, they'll say it back.
• Tell them how much you want to be with them and spend as much time with them as you can. They will appreciate that you are showing them your love and not just saying it.
• If the girl/guy does not love you back, there is a chance she/he will freak out. Proceed cautiously and slowly

Shine on, cause you too, can shine

If you've heard about Hachiko, the loyal dog may feel touched and some may even shed a tear. For those who doesn't know about it, let me give you a brief intro.

Hachikō (ハチ公, November 10, 1923–March 8, 1935), known in Japanese as chūken Hachikō (忠犬ハチ公, "faithful dog Hachikō" ('hachi' meaning 'eight', a number referring to the dog's birth order in the litter, and 'kō,' meaning prince or duke)), was an Akita dog born on a farm near the city of Ōdate, Akita Prefecture, remembered for his loyalty to his owner, even many years after his owner's death.

In 1924, Hidesaburō Ueno, a professor in the agriculture department at the University of Tokyo took in Hachikō as a pet. During his owner's life Hachikō saw him out from the front door and greeted him at the end of the day at the nearby Shibuya Station. The pair continued their daily routine until May 1925, when Professor Ueno did not return on the usual train one evening. The professor had suffered from a cerebral hemorrhage at the university that day. He died and never returned to the train station where his friend was waiting. Hachikō was loyal and every day for the next nine years he waited at Shibuya.

Hachikō was given away after his master's death, but he routinely escaped, showing up again and again at his old home. Eventually, Hachikō apparently realized that Professor Ueno no longer lived at the house. So he went to look for his master at the train station where he had accompanied him so many times before. Each day, Hachikō waited for Professor Ueno to return. And each day he did not see his friend among the commuters at the station.

The permanent fixture at the train station that was Hachikō attracted the attention of other commuters. Many of the people who frequented the Shibuya train station had seen Hachikō and Professor Ueno together each day. They brought Hachikō treats and food to nourish him during his wait.

This continued for nine years with Hachikō appearing precisely when the train was due at the station.

Hachikō died on March 8, 1935. He was found on a street in Shibuya. His heart was infected with filarial worms and 3-4 yakitori sticks were found in his stomach. His stuffed and mounted remains are kept at the National Science Museum of Japan in Ueno, Tokyo.

Moving on, today's story was not about Hachiko but of something similar. It's about how can a deaf play violin and still shine? Remember that you can touch the hearts of many and it is not your limitations or disabilities that causes a disadvantage. But the fact that you pursue to achieve your dreams and wanting to do so will be the driving force.

Lastly, this should be a good motivation for those who doubt their musical ability. It is also something for us to learn when we ask "Why are we different from others?". If you ask this, then you should also remember, "Why do you want/have to be like others?". I am reminded that "Music is a visible thing. Close your eyes... You will see."

Here's something to inspire yourself to be unique and stand out as a special. [Disclaimer: I'm not advertising for them, in case you ask].

Chapter 17: How to Generate True and Honest Love from Guys

We can feel with our gut the true nature of things. And sometimes you feel that, no matter how many love letters you send to one another, the feelings between you two are just not that genuine brand of love. What can you do to nurture that intimacy?


Steps:

1. First of all, you need to be able to love. This seems like a task that everyone is capable of, but with the concept of 'love' being as hazy and ill-defined as it is, it's not a simple as it seems. Love is not about economics, social politics, how he looks, how much he cares about you, or even the myriad attractive things that he does. It's a feeling that permeates everything you share together, like a constant music that is always playing in the background. Love is a feeling of comfort that seems like it has been there forever. If you feel that this is something you feel or are capable of feeling, then you need to build on that.
2. Secondly, you need to be able to love someone else more than yourself. This means that, above all else, a sense of closeness and respect for who he is. If you subscribe to the school of thought which dictates that 'you are a goddess, an independent woman, an amazing chick that he can't get anywhere else', you are not going to be able to grow closer. Statements such as the examples only distance yourself from him.
3. You need to realise the nature of men. Your boyfriend, contrary to what you might think, is not an all-forgiving endlessly-compassionate altruist. He is not capable of loving only you, because you are not the only thing in the universe. If you are looking down on him, bending him to your will, and he is complying, he is doing it in exchange for something. Usually, this will be sex or companionship, or alternatively, status and pride. When he grows tired of the relationship, he will move on in a heartbeat. If you do not take steps to build closeness with him, he will end up throwing you away like a used condom.

Tips:

• Don't make anything a big deal. Don't make your problems his problems. Don't rant or rave
• Focus on just having a good time together. Try to make the time you share free of pressure or drama.
• Focus on sharing experiences, thoughts and emotions together.
• If you have something emotional you are dealing with, be open with your boyfriend without being dramatic or self-pitying. He is not one of your girlfriends, so don't make it seem worse than it is, or labour the point. He wants to help you, so make sure he feels appreciated if he cheers you up.
• He want to feel accepted by your friends, and he wants you to be accepted by his friends. He will defend you against his friends if they don't like you. Make sure you do the same and try and create a good environment to be in together.

Warnings:

• Love should not be one-sided. There is no way to 'make him love you' if you don't love him.
• There is no magic pill to make a relationship work. If the relationship is already failing, there is often no reliable way to bring it back to working order.
• These are just guidelines for how to approach this idea. It is not a foolproof plan, and you should adapt it to suit your situation.